All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
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