I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
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