we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Randomize
