haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
