the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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