i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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