We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
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