1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
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