I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Randomize
