So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
