I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Randomize
