Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Randomize
