You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Randomize