check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
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