Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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