Is it because I queefed?
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize