I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Randomize
