do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
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