God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Randomize