$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
and she was petting her beer can
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
