Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize