So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
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I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
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Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
how drunk are you?
Several
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize