READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Randomize