what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
He shit in the fireplace
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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