ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
Randomize
