Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
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