Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
