This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
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