So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
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