apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
