Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
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