Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize
