: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
