I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
