You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
