So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
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His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
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Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
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