They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize
