I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
These tits shall not be calmed
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Randomize
