the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Randomize
