i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
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