smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
I'm sorry my penis didn't work
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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