I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
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