I'm jealous of your bromance
The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
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