I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize