just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
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