she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
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