I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
Rumble strips road head = magical
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Randomize
