I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize