I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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