did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
We just shotgunned beers for America
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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